Gap Year Escape – Gap Year Travel & Backpacking The World

In life there are few certainties but for me personally there is one that I know for sure. I wouldn’t be who I am without my friends. Whether old or new, best friends or a beautiful stranger you’ve all made a contribution and for that I am very grateful.

When you are travelling on the other side of the world it can be easy to forget your old life and the people who have always been there for you.

That being said, a very good friend of mine is celebrating her birthday today. I promised her Ugg boots but failed in that regard. I hope that this makes up for it.

I’d like to thank the 53 people (and animals) from around the world in helping me create this.

Happy Birthday Miriam.

Anyone who has gone tubing uses the same word – “awesome”.

I am currently in Vang Vieng (Laos) nursing several injuries after one hell of a day. Tubing is quite hard to describe. Imagine an 18-30’s holiday TV advertisement and stretch it throughout a day. Throw in a river, tractor inner tubes and rope swings and you get the general idea. If you still can’t picture it I have made a video for you!

Tubing is great fun and unlike anything I have ever seen or done before. However, the experience can sour if you are not careful. We had been advised by several backpackers to be mindful of the time. I think we were having too much fun to notice…

We found ourselves at the penultimate bar with only a few tubes. We had to share one between three which is a particularly difficult feat. I can only speculate that people steal them and collect the deposit. It soon became dark very quickly and despite being beautiful, star light wasn’t particularly helpful. We all linked up and I guess we thought there was safety in numbers at least.

We hit a patch of fast rocky water and found ourselves split up. I must admit I was pretty scared. I couldn’t see anything or anyone. I’d heard that only four days before a young guy on his honeymoon had drowned. Was certainly food for thought as I was on my own in the dark floating down a strange river. I managed to scramble to a riverbank but the current was so strong that I fell and hit some rocks and would have been swept away if I hadn’t of been pulled out by one our party (thanks Nick you literal lifesaver). Half of our party had made it to the same riverbank but we had no idea where the rest were. We couldn’t see a way out besides a fence which couldn’t be climbed so we ended up knocking it down. We had just knocked our way through into someone’s back garden while they were sat in it!

All I said was: “Taxi?”

You wouldn’t get away with that in the UK!

To cut a long story short we made it back safely and the others had managed to make it to a different riverbank and get a taxi. It wasn’t entirely a happy ending though. During our treacherous adventure a local boy had swam out to us, helped us paddle and then swam off. Turns out while we were distracted by the thought of drowning, he was busy robbing a bag which had four girls passports, cameras and purses.

Despite all this I would still do it again. Tubing is so much fun. It just happens to also be a bit dangerous. My advice would be don’t do it in the dark! The guys and girls have gone to do it again today! My knee and ankle is painful to walk on so I gave it a miss. Who puts big rocks in the river for me to fall into? Silly if you ask me.

On a happier note, enjoy the video!

Lies. You will be told many of them on your travels. You’ll be told that things are closed, that it’s two minutes away, that it’s a special price or that you don’t look fat. Bullshit. You’ll hear it all the time but the biggest one has to be that you shouldn’t do the two day slow boat down the Mekong River in Laos.

I left idle Pai to its own devices and made my way by bus to the border. As the door slid open I prayed for someone to talk to. No more Hebrew or German, please let the guys in here speak English! I didn’t get someone to talk to, it was even better; great friends and one hell of a brilliant time.

I was apprehensive about crossing the border, had some drug cartel stashed drugs in my backpack while I was sleeping? It all played on my mind. Unfortunately it was rather ordinary. Especially the part where the passport control officers didn’t smile. Is it in their job description that they can’t smile or is stamping passports and looking at terrible mug shots all day really that depressing?

Our arrival guide wanted to have a talk with us in his office which consisted of a plastic table set up right next to this shiny minivan with its air con blasting away. This friendly chap told us all kinds of stories. You can’t stand up on the boat, there is no food or drink, hotels are expensive and captain jack sparrow might come and get us. The list went on, but there was however hope. The shiny minivan could get us to Luang Prabang in one day rather than two and of course was a much better prospect. I didn’t care if I had to sit on the roof, with a rooster for company. I was getting on that boat no matter what he said. It turned out to be the best thing I ever did.

Fearing the worst we stocked up for our hellish journey. Supplies included Oreo’s, copious amounts of Whiskey, an acoustic guitar, nine plastic cups, iPod with speakers and a sense of humour. Nine plastic cups? There were eight of us. It’s a mystery, it really is…

I’ve never had so much fun on a boat. Although saying that I don’t think it had much to compete with as the ferry between Dover and Calais isn’t much to write home about. However, sitting on a bag of rice for nine hours is. The sky was always blue with puffy white clouds that looked like candy floss. If the captain (aka captain pug wash) was in a good mood you could lie outside and top up the tan. There was no shortage of embarrassing music to be pumped from my mp3 player (read: Peter Andre, Steps, Savage Garden etc) and everyone seemed to be able to play the guitar and sing. I’m considering buying myself a guitar now. Although I realise this won’t help me with the singing.

I’ve so far only noticed two differences between Laos and Thailand. This being the 11.30 curfew and having to take your shoes off before you go into places. Taking your shoes off with a backpack on is more of a challenge then you might think. Was a bit strange getting kicked out of a bar at 11 and we were told the only place left open after this time is bowling. Late night bowling it is then. Very strange!

There is a must see in Luang Prabang. I couldn’t tell you the name of the waterfall but any tuk tuk driver will know what you are talking about. There’s rope swings to play on and a fantastic view!

This amazing bar in Luang Prabang, Utopia, also has a volleyball court in the middle of it. As you do. After a rather heated and undecided game, a re-match is in order. After pulling off my shirt, beating my chest and doing the Haka, I’m going to have to put my money where my mouth is. Don’t worry those guys are going down…

I write to you with a sore head. I can’t provide you with the statistical proof but I am pretty sure Thai people, on average, are short. Either that or the purposely build low beams and roofs for me to hit my head on. I’ve lost count how many times I have done it now. Ow!

I have been in Thailand now for nearly two weeks and I am starting to come to terms with the culture and the people. Browsing the stalls one day I came across some ‘bottoms’ which were apparently authentic dress. A backpacker had recommended them to me, really comfortable and practical, apparently. They looked something reminiscent of what a kung fu master would wear in the movies. They would wrap them round, tie it off and pow! Kick some bad guy’s ass.

I saw a pair with Chinese writing down one side, they just looked cool! Got them home, wrapped it round me, tied it off and then… I caught my reflection.

It may look cool in the movies but really, I was just a guy in a skirt. Ahem, moving on…

I’ve not met a single backpacker who has not raved about Pai. In the middle of nowhere in North West Thailand it’s a tiny town with massive character. I can see why international and domestic tourists make the trip to Pai.

Every day in Pai feels like a Sunday. Everyone is just really mellow. Even the dogs just chill out in the middle of the road, not even flinching when someone goes past. I would estimate that a third of the people here have dreadlocks and a lot more are high (on life or drugs, who knows). Even so it is a rather picturesque paradise where you can really relax, do yoga, collect your thoughts, listen to reggae or jazz or drink Chinese tea. You get the idea. People get trapped in Pai, they go for a day and stay for seven. I’m trying to avoid the same trap.

Today I rented a motorbike. £2 for the day and a £1 to fill the tank up. Outstanding!

‘Ever rode bike before?’ said the mechanic.
‘Nope.’
‘Here’s key, don’t crash.’

Things are just too easy in Thailand. I don’t know why I spent four years at university. You can buy a degree here for £6.

I can’t say I knew what I was doing or where I was going but sticking on my aviators, getting on that bike and just blasting through the countryside was just amazing. Wind in my hair (?), sun on my skin and a grin on my face I just ate up the tarmac. I found myself singing Blur – Song 2. Don’t know why it just felt appropriate somehow. The monsoon rain came about an hour into my ride but I didn’t care. I was wet, so what. I’m free and happy and the rain just felt like it was watering my soul.

By the time you read this I will be on my way to Laos. One day on a bus and two days on a boat. Sounds painful and it probably will be but even the ‘bad’ stuff here is still great.

The adventure continues…

I’ve just come back from a Thai massage… that got your attention didn’t it! I’m afraid to report that there was no happy ending however having my arse cheeks massaged was oddly satisfying. Nevertheless, a massage was just what I needed after the last few days I’ve had.

I’m currently in north Thailand, Chiang Mai to be precise. After a 12 hour bus journey I was eager to get stuck in so signed myself up for a two day ‘trek’ in the jungle. The clue was in the name.

After a spot of shopping at a local market for supplies I was naive to think that the following hour of sitting on an elephants back was as hard as it was going to get. After lunch, the fun really began. We started our 8km ascent to the summit through the slippery jungle paths. The downside of going to Thailand in off-peak season is the monsoon rain which doesn’t stop it from being hot! The sun beat through the canopy and after a few falls I was just caked in mud and sweat. I don’t think I have ever looked or felt so bad and any sense of decorum was quickly abandoned.

I’m sure that there would be some who would have found this mild but for me this was one hell of a challenge. As I turned every corner I would hope for some flat ground but there would be nothing but more steep climbs. Brilliant.

Through laboured breaths and gritted teeth I dragged myself to the top where just out of relief I collapsed on some bamboo. I closed my eyes and just wished that I could no longer feel my legs. I could hear children laughing and playing. Was I dead?

I pulled myself together to take in the sight. At an altitude of 1400m was the tribal village of the Lahu. So far out of the way they have preserved much of their way of life. The village was very basic and missing some ‘fundamentals’ as I would see them, namely electricity. I learnt about this one the hard way when I had to stumble down bamboo steps to find the ‘toilet’.

The descent was also challenging but broken up with a swim in a waterfall, bamboo rafting and white water rafting, it was somewhat more manageable.

It was just so rewarding. Our tour guide called ‘Good’, who was actually pretty great, said that I should do a seven day trek next time. I’ll think long and hard about that one…

Despite being one of the hardest things I have ever done it was totally worth it. It was such an incredible experience.

You would think after getting back a long shower and bed would be in order but not quite. Instead I decided to have a rather crazy night, which finished just shy of 6am, with a group of Kiwi’s and Irish folk. Just imagine some deleted scene from Snatch that was too crass to make the director’s cut and you get the idea. Madness.

You never see an unhappy backpacker. Why? Because they are all too damn busy having an awesome time!

So far I have walked a tiger, upset a palace guard, kissed an iguana, befriended a lonely pug, seen a girl get peed on, climbed a waterfall, missed a tour bus and got followed by a lady boy. I’ve only been here a few days! Let’s start at the beginning shall we?

I’m sitting on the plane and it still hasn’t quite dawned on me that I am actually going to another country. Even when I get off and get a taxi I am still in denial. However, when you walk up the Khao San Road for the first time ever that is when you really know you are somewhere foreign!

The short tourist road houses anything a backpacker could surely want and is an ideal starting point for any visitor to Bangkok. The touts become somewhat of a cliché fast. The regular shouts include “suit!”, “fish massage” and “ping pong show”. My all time favourite has to be “happy ending boom boom taxi ride”. Lovely.

I must admit that it’s not all fun and games being a solo backpacker. Initially, it is quite difficult to get your head round the idea that you make best friends for the day and then never seem them again. Still it’s a valuable skill to develop, building instant rapport with someone. It is getting much easier. You learn fast when you’re on your own in the big bad world.

The highlight so far has to be the day just gone. A day tour in Kanchanaburi to see, among other things, the Tiger Temple. As a tourist attraction the tiger temple is morally dubious as the tigers are chained up and allegedly drugged to make them docile. Nevertheless, the fact remains that this is still a great ‘Kodak moment’.

A tiger did have the last laugh today though. One unsuspecting member of our party was walking behind a tiger when it decided to raise its tail and urinate straight into her face, open mouthed and up her nose. Outstanding.

I’ve just come back from a rather great night out. Went to the rooftop bar on the Khao San Road, which I would highly recommend. There is a live acoustic set which is one of the best I have ever seen. Spent the evening singing along to the likes of Oasis and Jason Mraz with people who are ultimately strangers but also your best friends at the very same time.

It’s just all rather strange, right mixed bag of emotions. Still through it all I can say that I am really happy.

So I will simply end with this…

"I mused for a few moments on the question of which was worse, to lead a life so boring that you are easily enchanted, or a life so full of stimulus that you are easily bored." – Bill Bryson.

I would imagine that slaving away all week, living for the weekend, would adequately express the former, but what about the latter?

Ask any backpacker about travelling and you could be stuck for hours engrossed in their numerous tales of lazy sunsets or missing the weekly bus back to civilisation. You will always betray a subtle hint of jealousy as you listen intently, wishing you could do and see these things for yourself. Green really isn’t my colour, so I thought I should try them out for myself.

I have spent hours with my nose buried in travel guides, perusing blogs and gazing at my giant wall map, dreaming of the possibilities. So many places to go, people to see and law enforcements to avoid. My time has finally come.

One year, three continents, ten countries and over 30,000 miles. The opportunity of a life time, one in which I’ll make every one of the 31,536,000 seconds I am away count. I’m sure as I stand in Heathrow on the 7^th September 2009, the realisation will sink in of the magnitude of the journey I am about to begin, especially on my own!

Still I can’t wait to leave. I’ll watch sunsets in Fiji, ride an elephant in Malaysia, spot the stars in LA, swim with sharks in Australia, jump out of planes in New Zealand and, of course, avoid the ladyboys in Thailand. Best of all, I’ll do it with a smile on my face having the best time of my life. At least I hope so! Things rarely go according to plan, but fingers crossed that will make the trip all the more memorable. Either way I’ll be keeping you posted how I get on. Until next time…

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